A message for my granddaughter Carys.

I remember the first time I saw you. You were delivered into the world with your eyes wide open and you took my breath away. Oh how long I had waited with your mum to meet you. We knew you would be you long before you were even conceived. I do not think there has ever been a baby as wanted as you were. 

Your birthday will always be one of my favorite days, ever.
My soul grew as you entered the world, and I found myself believing in miracles. My baby had a baby, against all odds. You were meant to be here. Before you were here an hour, I knew I would do anything for you.

Don' tell anybody because it might hurt their feelings, but you are my favorite.

I built you a home in my heart. You made me happy when skies were gray.

I loved being your YaYa.  I was so proud of you. I wanted to give you everything. I wanted you to know about your family. You grandmother, your great grandmother, and everyone you came from. The time we had was the happiest of my life.

I remember the last time I saw you. It was Hallowe'en, 2012. I didn't know it would be the last time, and if I had, it would have taken  my breath away too.

 I tried very hard to see you again.I love you sweet girl. Your little face breaks my heart. You are spectacular.

You will always be my Carys, my granddaughter and nobody can take that away. You are inside my heart and I am inside yours.  I’m really sad that I won’t be getting to spoil you, or go sneak chocolate, or take you on ice cream dates, and eat chocolate pie and pudding and gum.. Laughing all the time at what your mommy and daddy would say if they knew what we were doing. I will probably miss your school concerts and dance recitals, your first awards, your art work that won't hang on my fridge, and I might not be there to answer questions you will have, that only your mom's mum can answer.. But what's meant to be will always find its way. That is where my hope and faith waits.

Carys, never forget how much I love you. I wish I could grab you from my dreams and hug you for real. Maybe some day we will get our chance.  I will always be with you, in the brightest days and the darkest nights, always and always. I wanted to know you for longer but it wasn't to be.

There is not a day that goes by that I don't, at some point, think of you.

                                         I love you to the moon and back.

                                                   Please do not forget me.

Once there was a baby star. She lived up near the sun. And every night at bedtime that baby star wanted to have some fun. She would shine and shine, and fall and shoot and twinkle oh so bright. And she said: "Mommy I´ll run away if you make me say Good Night!"

And then her mommy kissed her sparkly nose and said: "No matter where you go, no matter where you are, no matter how big you grow, and even if you stray far, I’ll love you forever, ‘cause you’ll always be my baby star."